


Selfish

by TexMexTwins



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, bc reasons, slightly angsty, spelling viktor with a k, they're dating but not engaged yet, yuuri thinks he is selfish
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-10
Updated: 2016-12-10
Packaged: 2018-09-07 17:54:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8810356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TexMexTwins/pseuds/TexMexTwins
Summary: It's been a month since Yuuri won the Grand Prix Final gold medal, but he begins to have doubts over whether he has taken advantage of Viktor's flighty nature. Viktor is there to call him out on his stupidity.(aka in which Yuuri calls himself selfish and Viktor has to talk some sense into his tired and anxious bf)





	

**Author's Note:**

> Hey so I wrote this at like 4 in the morning last night but I actually really like it so here we are lol. I hope you like it! I had a lot of fun exploring the dynamic between Viktor and Yuuri regarding Yuuri's anxiety and tendency to worry more than necessary. Be sure to let me know what you think at the end!

“Viktor, am I unkind?”

When Viktor, laying on the bed beside him, glances up from his book to meet his eyes, Yuuri averts his gaze, shifting nervously. Instead, he watches Viktor’s hand as it moves to retrieve the bookmark from his bedside table, carefully slipping it between the pages of his book to give Yuuri his undivided attention.

“That’s a silly question,” he replies, a small smile tugging at his lips as he regards Yuuri curiously. “Why do you ask?”

Yuuri ducks lower beneath the duvet, hiding his mouth and nose from Viktor’s view as he mumbles, “Just curious,” under his breath.

Viktor takes a long, deep breath, his teasing gone as he realizes the seriousness with which Yuuri is approaching the conversation. He turns his body so that he is facing Yuuri, crossing his legs in front of him. “Yuuri,” he coaxes, his voice drawing Yuuri out slightly from where he is hiding beneath the covers of the bed. He reaches out, brushing Yuuri’s bangs away from his face and smiling at his confused expression. He wonders if Yuuri could even see his face without his glasses on. “Yuuri,” he repeats, and this time Yuuri meets his gaze, reluctantly. Viktor’s smile broadens before he continues, “You are one of the kindest, most thoughtful people I’ve ever met in my life, and it’s frankly stupid of you to think anything otherwise.”

For a moment, Yuuri looks almost offended, and Viktor laughs, leaning over to press a kiss to his furrowed brow. “You worry too much,” he says, and fixes him with a knowing look. “What is this really about, Yuuri?” Viktor’s voice takes on a more serious tone as he attempts to delve deeper into Yuuri’s concerns.

Yuuri glances away guiltily, frowning. “Viktor, am I selfish?” he asks.

“Selfish?” Viktor echoes, eyebrows raising in surprise. Of all the questions Yuuri could have asked, this was not one Viktor was expecting.

“Yes, selfish.” Yuuri meets Viktor’s gaze again, guilty and curious as he props himself up on his elbow, the duvet falling around his waist. “Do I ask for more than I can be expected to receive? Do I expect people to cater to me?”

Viktor frowns, tilting his head. “Yuuri, I’m confused.”

“Do you think I’m selfish?” Yuuri presses, speaking with more confidence now that the question is out in the open. “Have I ever said anything that made you think I was selfish?”

Viktor lets out a long breath, reaching out to cup Yuuri’s face in his hands. Instinctively, Yuuri drops his gaze, a pink blush blooming on his cheeks. “Yuuri, I want you to look at me,” he says, voice low, and what little sliver of humor that may have lingered on his tongue is gone now. Yuuri slowly, reluctantly, lifts his gaze to reconnect with Viktor’s, and Viktor brushes his thumbs over the soft skin of Yuuri’s cheeks. “Yuuri, you are many things,” he begins. “You’re impatient, stubborn, and reckless, and you’ve made me worry for you more than anyone else I’ve ever met. But I never have, and never will, consider you to be selfish.” He pauses, allowing his words to sink in before continuing. “If anything, you could stand to be a little more selfish! You hardly ever ask me for things, even though you know I would do anything for you.”

Yuuri cracks a smile, and Viktor mentally congratulates himself at his small victory as Yuuri reaches up and gently removes Viktor’s hands from his face, turning to fully face Viktor as he holds Viktor’s hands between the two of them. Absently, he rubs his thumbs over the backs of Viktor’s hands, a calming motion. “Thank you,” he murmurs.

Yuuri expects the conversation to end here, but Viktor has other plans. As Yuuri holds his hands, he asks, “Yuuri, who told you that you were selfish?”

The little smile Viktor had managed to summon abruptly disappears and Yuuri’s attention is brought back to the issue at hand. He bites his lip. “Even since I won the Grand Prix last month, people have been... talking,” he admits. “Everyone expected you to go back to skating after you were done with me, and when you didn’t, they got angry. When you announced that you were going to stay here, in Hasetsu, they accused me of coercing you. They say that I’m selfish for keeping you all to myself.” Yuuri bores holes into the backs of Viktor’s hands, held within Yuuri’s own trembling ones, and shakes his head. “They’re just stupid stories, I know, but I can’t help feeling like there’s some truth behind them.”

Viktor hums thoughtfully under his breath. Half of him wants to get angry at the media for spreading such lies, but the other half of him, his rational half, knows exactly what is going on. “They’ve got it all wrong,” he says, and Yuuri glances up at him in surprise. Viktor smiles, squeezing Yuuri’s hands. “The only truly selfish one here is me.”

“You’re not selfish,” Yuuri immediately denies, and Viktor loves him for it, but all he can do is chuckle, unable to agree.

“I’ve always been the selfish one,” he insists, “ever since the very first time I saw you. In the end, it was always me who wanted you all to myself.” He moves his hands so that they are beneath Yuuri’s, pulling them up to his mouth and placing a small kiss against his knuckles. “When I first saw you perform my free program all those months ago, my immediate thought was that I wanted to see more. I wanted to see you perform again, a routine for my eyes only. When I became your coach, I wanted to inspire you like you inspired me. I thought that if I could spend some time with you, who was able to invest so much of his emotions into his skating, I would be able to find the thing that I had lost.”

Viktor pauses, his breath ghosting over Yuuri’s hands and sending a shiver down his spine. Yuuri was staring at him in awe, his formerly discrete blush now a bright red. “The things that I discovered weren’t able to win back my desire to compete again. I think that, deep down, I had known for a long time that it would be my final season as a competitor, but it didn’t matter.” Viktor smiles, fond memories of his early days at Yutopia resurfacing. “I’d discovered something much, much better. I found love, and life, and family here in Hasetsu. I found so many precious things here, things that I wanted to cling to and never let go of, and I did it without so much as an invitation. Truly, if anyone is to be called selfish in this situation, it would be me, for wanting to be a part of something that wasn’t mine to have.”

Yuuri sniffs, and it is only then that Viktor notices the tears that came to Yuuri’s eyes. A surge of panic runs down his spine. “Yuuri! Why are you crying?” he exclaims, reaching behind him to grab a tissue from the nightstand. He holds it out to Yuuri, worried.

Yuuri accepts the tissue, quickly wiping away his tears as he shifts closer to Viktor, who moves his legs to accommodate him. Yuuri sits back on his heels, close enough that he could easily lean forward and touch Viktor, and seeks out his hands again, intertwining their fingers when he finds them. “None of us would ever call you selfish for coming here,” he murmurs. “You’ve done so much for us already, so much for me. When you told me at the airport that you wished I would never retire, it made me so happy...” Yuuri trails off, opening and closing his mouth as if trying to find the right words. He stares into Viktor’s eyes, his presence a calming influence, and swallows. “Viktor,” he began, squeezing Viktor’s fingers tightly, “I want you to stay here, with me, forever. I want you to be a part of my family, and I know everyone else does, too. I want to be with you, so...”

“Can I be a little selfish?”

Viktor doesn’t feel a need to say anything more, just swoops down and captures Yuuri’s lips in a long and loving kiss, light and giddy with happiness. He doesn’t feel the need to say anything because of course, of course he’ll stay!

The sentiment is only reinforced when Yuuri kisses him back with vigor, causing Viktor’s heart to somersault in his chest as he feels his entire body filling with the weight of Yuuri’s love.

Viktor pulls back first, and Yuuri leans slightly forward, looking disappointed at the loss of contact. Viktor smiles and runs his fingers fondly through Yuuri’s hair, chuckling when Yuuri leans into his hand, his eyes fluttering closed.

No, Viktor doesn’t need to say anything more. He has Yuuri, and Yuuri has him, and that is something that he hopes will never stop. As Viktor watches Yuuri snuggle beneath the covers of the bed, his grievances settled and his mind peaceful, he knows that he will never stop wanting Yuuri, and he knows that Yuuri feels the same way.

In that way, maybe they were both a little selfish.


End file.
